Thursday, April 21, 2011

Screaming child of mine.


One more sleepless night, one more day clinging onto ones sanity. She never stops crying, over and over her screams rip through my soul.

Walk up and down, up and down, the darkness knows what we are going through. I need a break just a short one, please someone; anyone help me!
Sing, sing, dance, dance, please little one, I don't know what to do.

Cries turn into bellowing demonic whispers, please stop, shuuuussshhhhh. "Mommy understands": I say knowing I have no clue. I know it will just get worse, with every passing hour, she will scream breathless into the night.
Until I feel like I hate her, until she makes me cry too. How a precious gift can be such a horrific nightmare.

I put her down in the middle of my bed, screaming, screaming her sorry song.

I sit in the corner rocking myself, singing a pathetic song trying to calm myself, calm the darkness, calm the world.

It's nights like these that makes me loose my mind.

"My baby never stopped screaming for the first 3 months of her life, no one knew why. Colic, hunger, allergies, me? Eventually the crying stopped, now we do get along better, she is lovely. She is 17 months now.
If you have no one to take a screaming baby you will loose your mind, the sound they make is horrible. So this is just me saying to new moms out there: If you feel alone and useless it's ok, we all felt that way. Give yourself a break you are doing the best you can. Get someone to watch the baby for a few hours a week and just get yourself back. This too will pass.

I love my little monster:)"

7 comments:

the walking man said...

Best to crib them and leave the room let them cry themselves out. We had the same problem and when the doc said do that a week later...no more need for the constant attention he had gotten used to...but now thirty years later it's usually wondering of the ATM of mom and dad is open. I don't know which is worse.

Charles Gramlich said...

A child's upset is the hardest thing in the world to deal with. none of us know how to handle it.

Catvibe said...

Wow, I remember those days well and so glad it was a long long time ago.
Finally I did what Mark suggests here. It's a hard thing to do and it worked well for one but not the other.
Also like Mark says, the challenges change but there are challenges throughout...life's little joke. :-) Luckily there is also so much love to ride the waves.

Drizel said...

man: I did try the cry it out method. I could not do it, made me feel even worse. The ATM will never be closed I guess, hihihi.
Charles: I felt so alone during that time.
cat: Yes it is a never ending ride, always something new you have no clue how to handle. Holding thumbs it will be ok:) Thanks:)

DPTH International said...

Great to hear from you again! My blogging has been sorely neglected as of late, but I hope to get into a rhythm again soon.

Take care!

Wayne Allen Sallee said...

Years from now, you'll miss the sound of that crying. It will be like a funny echo.

laughingwolf said...

i'm dad to 3... they slept thru the night, most of the time... now they're in their 20s... we all survive, somehow!